I love my job, I always have, and I hope I always will. I get excited about a lot of things my students are doing and I love learning new things myself. However I find these past few months I am constantly being over whelmed by how much is out there for me to still learn. Don't get me wrong, I've never felt that I've known it all, nor did I ever think I would know it all. But little has changed since I wrote this blog post back in July.
I am one that thrives on change and growth. I like to attempt to do what others believe can't be done - heck I've completed five Ironman distance triathlons with very little natural athletic ability. But professionally this has been a real struggle for me this year. Again, don't get me wrong, I am really happy with what I'm accomplishing with my students this year. They are a constant source of amazement for me which makes going to work so much fun. I know I'm doing a better job teaching grade one this year than I did last year. But, the more I read the more I learn there is so much more I could be doing with my students. I don't like dealing with the fact that I can't do it all. I don't like feeling like I'll never be as good as I think I can be.
In all honesty sometimes I wish I was like some of the others I know, those that are happy with where they are already. Things would be so much easier then. I would be able to find balance and peace in what I'm doing. But I have never, nor will I ever be that type of person. I like doing the hard work, and getting that feeling of satisfaction when I see my hard work pay off. That's something I'm trying to instil in my students too. I actually like working hard, and being challenged, and constantly challenging myself.
So where does this strong desire to achieve and this struggle of knowing I'll never really get there leave me? It leaves me trying to find balance. The big question is how do I find this balance?
Hi, you are defining the wrong measure of success, you are not aiming to be a magpie, a collector of shiny things for your kids.ReplyDelete
You are aiming to be the most effective broker of learning for your kids. That means brokering the following:
Their furry little personalities and needs
Cool shiny ideas
You combine that to be the best blend to deliver the biggest impact.ReplyDelete
Have a look at blogs.plymuniprimary.com to find a group of trainees to share your experiences with, you could register your blog there too.
Nope, not searching for shining things searching for being the best I can be but trying to stay balanced with what that really looks like. Trying to find peace in where I am right now, when ever that right now is. It actually has absolutely nothing to do with shiny things. I do like the term of being the most effective broker of learning for my students though but I don't think I can ever achieve that most effective brokering. Balance is what I will strive for. Thanks for the comments.ReplyDelete